Signs and wonders

Elizabeth is coming home tomorrow. And Matthew got out the Christmas lights. There are snowflakes in the window. There's a box of wrapping paper in the upstairs hallway. There are 3 lit candles in the Advent wreath. The calendar says its December. Even baby Max has arrived. All the signs point to it being nearly Christmas. But I don't feel it yet. The stores have been playing the same music for weeks already, and so far I just find it annoying. Oh how I need a little spirit of Christmas! Maybe I really do need to think about gifts and wrapping and cookies...but I'm not quite ready yet. Is it because I secretly relish the panic of last minute preparation? Or is it because I know I will never really be ready for the hype? I am trying to be peaceful and spiritual and just keep it a wonderful family time. But I don't know who else has expectations that I'm failing miserably to meet. (Well maybe I suspect, but I'm trying to suppress that too). I guess I need to make a pre-New Year's resolution to try just a little harder this week. Maybe I will try to get organized tomorrow when I'm alone for a few hours. But that means I need to get in to work and get stuff done today (another concentration problem...ooh am I a mess). Well, here goes...